Pimps, Goats, and Monsoons – My Weekend in Memphis

Hey ya’ll! Hope everyone’s having a great week so far. As of right now, my ‘k’ key is sticking, so I’m warning ya’ll now – it all of a sudden you are reading and you see a word like “ite” or “itten” or “nuckle” or even my favorite “aleidoscope” (really going to try to work that word in this post)– and you wonder where all the ‘K’s are, well they are with me. Hiding in my laptop. Today is “bring your K to work day” or perhaps the Ks have escaped to the underground railroad and my laptop is a safehouse for all the enslaved Ks. Who knows – if I see Harriet Tubman out and about, then I’ll let you know.

On to my story for the day! This past weekend, Sully and I went to Memphis to see Daisy. Daisy is clerking at [insert fancy law firm name here], and this past weekend was her last in Memphis before she goes to her next clerkship. Naturally, we had to come visit her.

Did I mention that she is living with 3 cute pharmacy school boys? No? Well she is. But, that was not my motivation for driving to Memphis -- I am a married woman for goodness’ sake. With a very cute husband. Besides, they were out of town.

Pharmers or no pharmers, we had a blast. I have never been to Memphis for good girly fun. I went once in high school for a mock trial competition, but the most exciting thing we did then was go look at the ducks at the Peabody. Whoo.

So, Daisy, being the perfectly beautiful hostess that she is, planned a weekend to remember. I haven’t had so much fun since my birthday (which was well over a month ago), and this weekend was probably better.

However, the purpose of this post is not to shower you with stories about our giggly drunken behavior. No – the purpose of this post is to tell you of my top 5 favorite places to go in Memphis. Granted - - these are the only 5 places that I went while I was in Memphis, but they all rocked.

5. Silky O’Sullivan’s (also known as the goat habitat and dueling piano bar) – This place was super fun. It was very lively, and had a big indoor and outdoor area. Indoors, there are tons of tables crammed full and dueling piano players up at the front. Outside, there is another area for a band and a really fat goat who lives in a spiral staircase and wooden tower. He comes down the staircase and will eat pretty much anything. One disturbing part – the bright lights shining on the goat house illuminated a bunch of creepy roaches crawling on the wooden tower. I did not like that part, so I stayed away from Silky’s goat. Other than that, it is very entertaining, and one of the best places on Beale Street.

4. Miss Cordelia’s – I’m pretty much in love with Mud Island. For those of you who don’t know, Mud Island is this cute little island(?) that has all the adorable houses and is surrounded by a really nice park which is right on the water. I am a little scared to live in Memphis, but if I ever did, Mud Island is where I would live. Its just soooo cute. It reminds me of an upscale beach neighborhood (the placement and architecture of the houses), and there are a ton of cute little shops dotting around the island. So, why am I babbling about Mud Island? Because that is where Miss Cordelia’s is. Miss Cordelia’s is a quaint little grocery store, florist, and restaurant – all in one! The food is amazing. I had a Greek sandwich – shaved chicken, roasted red peppers, tomatoes, pesto mayo, and feta cheese on a focaccia roll. Yum.

After you are done stuffing yourself, you can walk into the little grocery store section. Miss Cordelia has everything you need, and the food is presented in such a way that you feel that you are either in (a) a really posh little market trying to be homey or (b) a homey little store trying to be posh. Either way – its completely fabulous, and they have the most beautiful fresh flowers. While I was there, they had huge bunches of gladiolas for 8 bucks. Of course, Daisy’s roomies didn’t have a vase of any kind in their apartment, so we didn’t get any. But don’t think I didn’t lust after those gorgeous glads for days.

In conclusion – Miss Cordelia’s = Posh A+

3. Zanzibar’s – to get from Mud Island (where we stayed) to Zanzibar’s, you can take the trolley. It only costs $1, and it will take you all over the city. Plus, you get to feel like a complete tourist – no fanny pack needed.

Zanzibar’s is this great little bistro in the South Main district. I don’t know it if is officially located in the “art district,” but it had a gallery inside the restaurant and there was another art museum across the street. All around were little bohemian shops. Z’s decor was a 'aleidoscope' of colors and was very delicious (red and yellow pepper frittata, roasted potatoes and one perfect bloody Mary). I have to say that my favorite part of the place wasn’t the food, but rather the little jazz band playing the brunch on Sunday morning. I mean – where else can you go that has a band at noon on a Sunday? Only Memphis, only Memphis.

2. Blue Fin – okay, so really – why are all of my favorite places restaurants? Because I have a lifelong dream of being a professional eater. I am such a foodie. Food! Yum!

On to Blue Fin – it is a very hip sushi place downtown. Very “Sex in the City” ambiance. They seriously have the best edamame I have ever tasted. The place is decorated with amazing oil paintings and a lot of the tables are placed between huge beautiful blue velvet modern couches. Wow – I just used 5 adjectives to describe those couches – but I guess 4 just wouldn’t do the them justice. The place is fairly priced for upscale sushi and the rolls...oooooh – don’t get me started on their sushi rolls. Uh-mazing.

1. So, wonder what my number one favorite place was? I bet you do. Okay – since number one is so special, let’s play a game. I’m going to give you clues – one at a time. See how many clues it takes to guess number one, and then tell me in the comments.

Okay – first clue. It has a stripper pole, but it is not a strip club.

Second – the use of several smoke machines and flashing sirens are this place’s primary decorative elements.

Third – The only thing this place serves is Bud Light 40’s. That’s right. 40’s.

Fourth – The primary activity at this place is dancing on the stage and on the Saturday Night Fever-esque dance floor.

Fifth – This business sends limos all around the city to pick patrons up…for free.

Sixth – The crowd is predominantly white.

Seventh – It is in a sketchy part of town.

Eighth – Most people literally dance until dawn.

Ninth – The DJ is famous in Memphis for his Geri-Curl hair.

Tenth – And his outrageous attire.

Eleventh – And his former profession.

Twelfth – The place is named after this famous DJ – he owns it.

Thirteenth - Here is a picture of us. Okay so maybe this is or isn't a clue, but Blogger's photo upload thingie isn't working right now, so this is the next best way to show your our sweaty (or "glowing" if you are my mother) faces!

Still don’t know? Well, okay. The place is called Raiford’s (pronounced ray-furds). Raiford used to be/still might be a pimp. The night we were there he had on a bedazzled black and gray track suit, matching boots, and a cape. Fabulous.

He has this crazy dance club that plays all the fun dance music from the 80’s, 90’s, and today (do I sound like a radio station ad or what?). I’ll warn you – a night at Raiford’s must be carefully planned. Do not – I repeat – DO NOT go to Raiford’s the night before a big event. You will need at least an entire day to recover. But it is well worth the day of recovery. I have to say that I think the limo part was the best. My friends and I finished bar-hopping on Beale Street and were looking for a cab to take us to Raiford’s. All of a sudden – as if the Raiford’s angel could hear our pleas, a limo with the name “Raiford’s” pulls up, the doors open, and off we go to our late night dance party.

Well – as you can see I would embarrassingly fail as a Memphis tour guide. All my guests would be drunk and fat by the time I was through with them. But – I hope you enjoyed my little stab at tourism writing. And the next time you want to go to Raiford's...I'm so there.

As for the monsoon reference in the title - Sully and I drove home in the heaviest rain I have witnessed in a long time. I'm quite positive that the rain cloud thought we were hot, so he just followed us all the way from Memphis to Nashville. I still have white knuckles from gripping the steering wheel so tightly. We drove on average 35 mph on an interstate with a posted speed limit of 70. It was awful. I feel for the people who experience a true monsoon season. Monsoonies - my heart goes out to you. While my experience was awful, your experience is at least a 127 times worse.

Okay - that's all for now. Bye!


laura said...

Maybe fat & drunk, but happy at least.... Fat, Drunk, & Happy - is there any other way?

erikaboo said...

I would love to be Thin, Rich, Drunk, and Happy - but until I graduate from law school, rich is out of the question. As for skinny, well, fat is so much easier to attain!

Anonymous said...

I'm looking for a shop in (or near) Memphis that has paintings signed "Funky Finds". My friend has a couple of cute, retro yet contemporary paintings and she can't remember the name of the store (sure she can't). I did a search for "Funky Finds" but I didn't find a shop named that. Have you or your friends ever been to a shop like this? kristinadevinney@comcast.net (from Nashville)

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